Learning

Family, i am glad that yall are doing well and that you survived your trip down south. Isnt the south awesome?! and Porter there are Lizards everywhere here too and they freak me out. i dont like them. But this week has been really good weather, and on thursday it was so rainy it flooded everywhere and cars were getting staled in the roads cause it was like driving in  a river the water was so deep. it was awesome! but now the mosquitos are out in full force with all the water left over. I might be one big mosquito bite by the time i get home! haha but i am having a great time.

I was pretty sick this week tho. i had a fever everyday last week except yesterday. I was so weak i could barely get out of bed. It was the weirdest thing. and my health was effecting the work so finally becauase i wasnt getting better i had the elders give me a blessing and now i am doing TONS better! alot of the members told me that htat is just what happends when the weather changes, because it will be super cold in the morning and then get really hot in the afternoon. and because of the humidity the cold goes into your bones and really chills you. now i just have a bad cold but its alot better then it was before!

So that having been said we didnt get much done this week. We taught a couple lessons and we found 2 new gators but i feel really bad cause we were going to kick butt this week and do work and then i was sick. but all i can do is just work even harder this week! Feeling bad about thigns doesnt accomplish anything. just got to work harder. But i had alot of time to think while i was down for the count. I was thinking about yall and the fun that you were having and how i was kinda sad that i was missing out on it, but then i was reminded of what elder bednar said at our stake conference before i left, that my absence will make more of an impact then my presence ever could. and i thought about how yall will have good memories from that trip and you will think about them and hopefully you will remember that i wasnt there and when you remembver that iwasnt there you will remember that i was serving a mission, and when you (especially Konor and Porter), think about how i was serving a mission you will remember that if i can do it you can do it, and you can do hard things and that serving a mission is the most amazing thing you could ever do with 2 years of your life and you will never regret the time that you spent in the service of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

I was having a hard day and talking about how i was worthless as a missionary and i should just go home and how i was missing out on everything and sister C said something very profound to me. She said that i will have the rest of my life to be with my family and to do worldy things, but i only have this 18 months to serve a mission and to give my whole self to the Lord. That really hit me. its so true. when i first came out i found myself wishing away my time and hoping that it would go by fast, and now that i am more then halfway done i am wishing for more time!  But all i can do is make the most of the time that i have here and to remember that i will never get this time back. this is sacred time because i am on the lords time. Serving a mission is so special and personal, I feel so privledged to be able to be out here and im so grateful for a family that supports me and encourages me to do better and to be better! My testimony of my savior has grown so much and i feel like i now have a personal relationship with him and i know that he is always with me and helping me along. 

I know that prayer works! we have so many members praying for our investigators and i know that yall are praying for our investigators and they are being blessed because of it. Last night J told us that he would get baptized! it is truly a miracle and i know that the lord softened his heart because of all yall praying for him. The spirit does wonders and works miracles on our hearts when we let it. 

We have been having a hard time with our zone leaders and last night it was really bad. i wont go into the petty details but lets just say that i was so mad after they hung up that i screamed bloody murder at the top of my lungs for about 45 seconds to let off steam. hahaha but i prayed for strength and charity to be nice to them and to support them as my leaders and this morning it was put to the test when they showed up at our door step and brought us something but told us that they werent really sorry they were just sorry enough to come over to save face. But i was able to just let it go and get over myself being a girl and i even gave them some cupcakes that i made. That may seem dumb and it kinda is but that was a big step for me. to bite my tongue, swallow my pride (because they were the ones in the wrong and they knew it they just woldnt admit it), and to forgive them and just show them christ like love. Charity is the hardest christ like attribute to master i think because there is so much that is a part of it. but that is why if you have charity you are good to go. but it is a life time process to have charity in your heart. just like conversion isnt an event it is a process. And i am so blessed to have this experience to help me in my process to becoming fully converted. yall think that you had a good time in Florida but i am really the lucky one to be here in Beaumont Texas Serving a mission! I love yall soooo soooo much! i hopeyou know that. I will be eternally grateful for the impact that each and every one of you have had on my life. yall have changed me and helped me become the person that i am and the person that i am striving to become.

have a good week!

Love sister hamilton